The Double Menace -- Spike and Drusilla portrayed by James Marsters and Juliet Landau -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Spike and Dru are just so damn cool - and Spike is the best bad guy ever on Buffy. If all bad guys could be like him, the world would be a much more entertaining place. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Spike: Spike. You're that Anointed guy. I read about you. You've got Slayer problems. That's a bad piece of luck. Do you know what I find works real good with Slayers? Killing them. (School Hard) Dru: I think sometimes that all my hair will fall out and I'll be bald. (School Hard) Spike:(lets go of the man) I'm a veal kind of guy. You're too old to eat. (grabs his head and snaps his neck) But not to kill. I feel better. (School Hard) Spike: Slaaayer! Here, kitty, kittyyy. I find one of your friends first, I'm gonna suck 'em dry. And use their bones to bash your head in. (kicks a door open.) Are you getting a word picture here? (School Hard) Dru: You are my Spike, my sweet... (School Hard) Dru: Miss Edith speaks out of turn. She's a bad example, and will have no cakes tonight. (School Hard) Spike:I was actually at Woodstock. That was a weird gig. I fed off a flower person, and spent the next six hours watching my hand move. (School Hard) Dru: Do you like Daisies? I plant them but they always die. Everything I put in the ground withers and dies... (School Hard) Dru: I'm a princess (School Hard) Buffy: Who are you? Spike: You'll find out on Saturday. Buffy: What happens on Saturday? Spike: I kill you. (School Hard) Spike: Got to do me one favor. (Gives Sheila to Dru.) Eat something. Dru: (turns Sheila to the dolls.) You see, Miss Edith? If you'd been good you could watch with the rest. (School Hard) Buffy: Do we really need weapons for this? Spike: I just like them. They make me feel all manly (School Hard) Spike: A Slayer with family and friends. That sure as hell wasn't in the brochure. Dru: You'll kill her, and then we'll have a nice celebration. Spike: Yeah, a party. Dru: Yeah. With streamers... and songs. Spike: How's the Annoying One? Dru: He doesn't want to play... (School Hard) Spike: I was rash, and if I had to do it all over again... (breaks out in laughter) Who am I kidding? (stands up) I would do it exactly the same, only I'd do this... (grabs Colin) Colin: No! Spike: ...first! (He picks up Colin and throws him into a cage, and begins to raise it into the sun.) From now on, we're gonna have a little less ritual... (stops pulling the chain) ...and a little more fun around here. (He gives one last pull on the chain, and Colin is exposed to the sunlight. His screams fade to nothing.) Lets see what's on TV. (School Hard) Dru:I'll give you a seed if you sing... Spike:The birds dead, Dru. You left it in the cage, and you didn't feed it, and now it's all dead, just like the last one. (Dru pouts) Oh, I'm sorry, baby. I'm a bad rude man. I just don't like you going out and all. You are weak. Would you like a new bird? One that's not dead. (Lie to Me) Spike:This is just...neat (Halloween) Dru: Miss Edith needs her tea... (Halloween) Dru: I was dreaming. Spike: Of what, pet? Dru: We were in Paris. You had a branding iron. Spike: I brought you something. Dru: And there were worms in my baguette. (What's My Line, part 2) Dru:Do you love my insides? The parts you can't see? Spike: Eyeballs to entrails, my sweet. (What's My Line, part 2) Dru: Do you know what I miss? Leaches. (What's my Line, part 2) Dru: Everything in my head is singing... (Innocence) Dru:I'm naming all the stars Spike: You can't see the stars, love. That's the ceiling. Also its day. Dru: I can see them. But I've named them all the same thing, and there's terrible confusion... (Innocence) Dru: You don't want to kill her, do you? (pokes Miss Edith's eyes.) You want to hurt her. Just like you hurt me. (Innocence) Dru: I brought something for you. (Carrying a dog.) Poor thing, she's lonesome. Her owner died...without a fight. Do you like her? I brought her specially for you to cheer you up, and I named her Sunshine. (Passion) Dru: Why Angel, where have you been? The sun is almost up, and it can be so hurtful. We were worried. Spike: No, we weren't. (Passion) Spike: Are you insane? We're supposed to kill the bitch, not leave gag gifts in her friends' beds. Dru: But Spike, the bad teacher was going to restore Angel's soul. Spike: And what if she did. If you ask me, I find myself preferring the old Buffywhipped Angelus. This new and improved version is not playing with a full sack. I love a good slaughter as much as the next bloke, but his little pranks will only leave us with one incredibly brassed off slayer. Angelus: Don't worry, roller boy, I've got everything under control. (Passion) Spike: It's paradise. Big windows, lovely gardens. It'll be perfect when we want the sunlight to kill us. Angelus: If you don't like it, Spike, hit the stairs and go. Take a stand, man. Spike: Well, our old place was just fine 'til you went and had it burned down. Angelus: Things change, Spikey. You gotta roll with the punches. Well, actually, you pretty much got that part down, haven't you? (I Only Have Eyes for You) Dru: Maybe I'll sleep underground. Dig myself a little burrow. Spike: What about your pretty dress, sweet? It'll get all dirty. Dru: Then I'll sleep naked. Like the animals do. (I Only Have Eyes for You) Spike: You might want to let up. They say when you've drawn blood, you've exfoliated. Angelus: What do you know about it? I'm the one who was friggin' violated. You didn't have this thing in you. Dru: What was it? A demon? Angelus: Love! (I Only Have Eyes for You) Angelus: Let's get outta here. I need a real vile kill before sunup to wipe this crap out of my system. Dru: Of course. We'll find you a nice toddler. (I Only Have Eyes for You) Angelus: No can do, Dru. I'm sure he'd be hell on wheels, but we don't have much time. Gotta travel light. Sorry. Try to have fun without me. ( Angelus and Dru leave.) Spike: Oh, I will. (He slowly rises from the wheelchair, fully recovered.) Sooner than you think. (I Only Have Eyes for You) Dru: I met an old man. Didn't like him. He got stuck in my teeth. But then the Moon started whispering to me... All sorts of dreadful things. (Becoming, part 1) Spike: It's a big rock. I can't wait to tell my friends. They don't have a rock this big. (Becoming, part 1) Spike: Let me guess. Someone pulls out the sword... Angelus: Someone worthy... Spike: Mm. The demon wakes up, and wackiness ensues. Dru: He will swallow the world. (Becoming, part 1) Spike: (sing-song) Someone wasn't worthy. (Becoming, part 1) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Return to Buffy Return to my homepage -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all names and likenesses created by Joss Whedon. Pictures are © 1997 The WB Television Network and Ultimate TV. Some are from the hosted by geocities